I feel so bad.
I really had no idea that everytyhing would unravel like this.:-(
On the plus side, I do ♥ my new gynaecologist. He is so nice, especially compared to the one that I left.The new doc requested a urine sample, which they tested. It was revealed that it contained nitrates and I was prescribed a one-off anti-biotic. Then he phoned me this morning to tell me two things. One, it was safe for me to take cortico-steroids for my MS relapse, and two, my urine sample, which had been cultured, showed bacteria that needed additional anti-biotics.
So now I have:
- an MS relapse that I can’t handle anymore.
- An almost anit-biotic resistant bladder infection.
- Oh, and I’ve gotten Michael’s flu. The one that’s been going around.
I’m hardly going out at all anymore, and when I do, it floors me. Come to think of it, when I eat a reasonable-sized meal it floors me.
Getting a wee bit desperate. Not helped at all by the flu.
The doctors are divided about giving me cortico-steroids while pregnant. My neurologist still says no. My obstetrician/ gynaecologist is quite firm about wanting me to treat the MS relapse. He says it’s dangearous for me and the baby not to treat it. And he says that it (the meds) is generally considered safe for baby, especially at this stage of the pregnancy, where everything is already formed.
Apart from anything else, I am so weak and unbalanced that I worry about falling. And I can’t help stressing for most of the day. Because I am battling for most of the day.
But before I even think about taking cortisone, I need to get the flu and bladder infection under control.
I am feeling quite miserable.
And worried about Vivi Rose.
I just don’t know if I can hold out for another 3 months. I don’t know if there will be anything left of me.
Talking about Vivienne, had a sonar done on Monday and she’s looking fabulous. And weighing in just right. 842g at 26 weeks. And so pretty. I love her so much.
Maybe I’ll feel better once the flu and UTI pass. I sincerely hope so.
It has been a really tough week, with my eyes being heavily impacted by the MS. My eye muscles are strained and my vision is weak. It sucks and stresses me out.
I can’t take corticosteroids. Well, I can, but it would be pretty ill-advised.
And I can’t take my usual homeopathic remedy, as it’s not safe during pregnancy.
Luckily, it does seem to be getting better (but so s-l-o-w-l-y)
I read that a top home remedy for optic neuritis is soya milk, taken at bed-time. I found a good one at Woolworths. Organic Soy Milk, in which the only ingredients are water and organic (hulled) soya beans. I’ve had a glass so far, and my eyes do seem fractionally, infinitesimally better.
And for the record, my walking is noticably improved. And my balance. I just feel dizzy quite a lot because of my eyes.
Then, just had to share these photo’s. They were taken a week ago. I had my Angry Bird T-shirt on and when I looked down, I saw to my amusement that the Angry Bird’s face was popping out in 3D, courtersy of my rapidly growing bump. Got Michael to take these snaps, because honestly, how often does that happen :-)
I took a good look at the 4D scan that I posted yesterday and had a good chuckle, because Vivienne is wearing her umbilical cord on her head like a hat :-) A girl’s earliest fashion accessory.
When I wake up in the morning and see my belly, I think “Oh no, look at the stretch marks that appeared overnight!” Then,on consideration, I realise that they are, in fact, pillow creases :-) And no, I most definitely don’t sleep on my stomach anymore. It’s the pillow that is next to me, lol.
This pregnancy has surprised me.
What I did expect:
At least some of the usual pregnancy symptoms. (Pretty much none, at this stage.)
To be quite huge by five months pregnant. (Not so much. I have a nice roundy little belly, but I’m still mostly in my own (elasticated) clothes.
What I was not prepared for:
Being plunged back into the MS wilderness, after five glorious, relapse-free years. (I really didn’t think this would happen.)
Anyway, the reason I am feeling happier is that the relapse appears to be backing off. (Bizarre, given my track-record but extremely welcome).
Symptoms that have improved:
My balance. No more of that feeling dizzy when I sit up in bed before I go to the bathroom at night.
Also, I can actually walk on the grass, which was a real challenge last week. (grass is surprisingly uneven if you have balance issues. I can also sit in the garden chair without it being a huge effort to avoid toppling over. Seriously, I felt exhausted after sitting in the garden for ten minutes.
I don’t have that spaced out, dizzy feeling anymore from not being able to focus my eyes properly. I think my vision is improving, too, though it is still not brilliant.
I have more energy (or it’s not so severely limited at any rate) and my walking is stronger. I can actually go to the shops with Michael without it being too huge an endeavour.
I’m not exacerbating anymore after eating a reasonably substantial meal. (Not much, anyway).
My balance is a bit better in the dark/ when I close my eyes.
My speech is better, too. While I wasn’t exactly slurring my words, I was finding it difficult to articulate some of them. This has passed.
I do have a new symptom, which is an intermittent numbness on my forehead. It feels rather like hair falling over my forehead, when there is none. I keep flicking away imaginary hair.
This doesn’t affect any function on my part, thankfully. It is mostly just annoying, but what it represents is more sinister. I’m hoping it will go away soon.
The trend seems to be, so far in the pregnancy, that a relapse lasts for about two weeks, and then eases off. I really hope this is the last one, however.
Felt down today.
So happy on the one hand, so blah from the MS on the other. I should be happy that I have no trouble from the pregnancy. No back-ache (yay!), no nausea, no heartburn, no headaches, no stretch marks (although it is early days yet), no erratic mood swings (amazing, considering the MS stress). Very easy-going pregnancy.
The MS relapse does seem to be improving. My walking and balance are better. The trouble I had focusing my vision is also better than it was. Alas, my visual accuity has gone down quite significantly, which is terrifying. Mainly in my left eye. I still have very limited energy, but mobility-wise, it is at least better than it was. I am so very grateful for the improvements and praying hard that the improvement can keep going.
I’m very hopeful that the third trimester will be much better. The protective hormones are at their strongest in the last trimester and also, the weather is getting cooler every day now, which helps a lot!
I’m quite sure I felt Vivienne on the move today. It was very gentle; hard to be definite, but it felt similar to the previous little nudges that I thought I felt.
And to end off with, just look at this gorgeous little leg, belonging to Vivienne (from the 4D batch taken on Monday).. Ballerina maybe? :-) My little sweet-pea.
I am definitely starting to feel better, MS-wise. Thank the Lord! I was feeling miserable and quite scared. I am very much against taking cortisone while pregnant, and it seems as if I’ve gotten a reprieve.
The thing is, I’m so in love with this little girl inside me. I can’t bear to think of causing her any distress.
I’m not feeling up to running a marathon (or even going with for the dogs’ daily 2km walk), but at least I’m not feeling dizzy the whole time from not being ables to focus my eyes. And also my balance is improved and I have a little more stamina with my walking. It is wonderful not to be getting worse, but in fact better.
I’m not used to my MS acting like this. Usually, once a relapse gets going, there’s no slowing it down. Pregnancy hormones are doing weird things to my MS.
Monday, which was the first day that I had started to feel better, we went to our GP for the 20 week check up scan.
Thankfully, everything is looking so good. And it is definitely a little girl :-)
The doc battled to get a good picture of her little face because she is always waving her little hands in front of her face.
But in this one, one can see quite a lot of her face.
So without further ado, here’s introducing the gorgeous little Vivienne Rose…
That’s how it feels. Waiting for things to get worse, or (hopefully) better.
I will say that I did not have an exacerbation today, for the second day running. I find it a lot easier to be positive and not stressed out if I do not get myself into a bit of a state, MS-wise. Which probably helps in itself.
I am very spoilt. My MIL sent over some pancakes for me. (Michael had his at her house). Thanks, Mom. Perfect for a rainy day. I must say, lying in bed, with the sound of the rain on the roof, doesn’t hurt, either.
I don’t feel quite as good as I did yesterday this time, relatively speaking. However, I did have a much better night, last night. Got quite a good night’s sleep, actually.
My eyes were bothering me a little today. (That thing where the muscles in my eyes don’t want to focus that brilliantly,)
All in all, though, not too bad a day. I wouldn’t say that it has gotten worse, at any rate.